Bizarre workings of the unconscious mind

I had a dream last night. It was a most peculiar dream.

I do not remember where it started, but I remember I was doing something entirely unrelated, walking down the street, when suddenly a group of people dressed as fruits started following me, talking to me about their nutritional value. They were out to teach kindergarden children about fruits and vegetables, when suddenly they had gone insane. They were pursuing me and I knew I had to run.

Unfortunately, I had some sort of strange katamari damacy-condition that meant I had to keep holding on to everything I touched with my hands. I didn't stick to it or anything, it was just this psychological tic that I had to pick it up and keep it. One of the strange fruit-men tried to stop me, and I crashed into him - he was holding a giant pillow which I touched with my hands, and so I had to take it and run away with it. This enraged the fruit-men, for now I had stolen from them - so they all ran after me, shouting loudly about nutritional values and about how Gustav Vasa ate lots of blueberries.

Then, as I was fleeing, I barreled into a group of people dressed as superheroes. These, too, were insane, and I realized to my great horror that some sort of curse or virus or affliction was making everyone who dressed up as something else insane. It wasn't "they believe they are what they are dressed up as", they just became these weird babbling zombie types that pursued people and spewed nonsense at them. Unfortunately my katamari-curse meant I had to steal guy-dressed-as-Spiderman's mask and gloves because I had touched them, and I made a mental note not to put them on, or I would be forever doomed.

Now I was running carrying a mask, some gloves, and a giant pillow, and I was trying very hard not to drop them, but they were slowing me down. As I was running, I got the brilliant idea of putting the pillow on my head, and putting all the Spiderman paraphernalia in my pockets, so that helped. Then I found a third group of people, dressed up as mythical beings. They had captured this woman and were forcefully dressing her up as a mermaid. I decided to use my katamari-curse to save her, so I touched all the mermaid-clothes - because apparently, nobody else could take anything from me once I had picked it up - and left the woman naked, but her soul was intact. This enraged the mythical-creatures people even more than I had enraged the fruit-men, so they left the woman alone and started following me.

I quickly ran inside my apartment, because I had devised a brilliant scheme by which I could keep safe. I camouflaged the door to the apartment with the giant pillow (apparently, I could put it down now, somehow) so that nobody could find it, then I ran inside and hid under the covers. Too late, I realized that hiding under the covers counted as being "disguised", and so the curse afflicted me. I put on the Spiderman mask and gloves, and went permanently insane.

The end. As in, I woke up.